Welcome to another Man-tastic Monday! Today I thought we would talk about flatulence, tooting, farting, SBD (silent but deadly) and gas in general.
Here is the definition I found on Wikipedia.....
Flatulence is the expulsion through the
rectum of a mixture of gases that are byproducts of the digestion process of
mammals and other animals. The mixture of gases is known as
flatus, (informally)
fart, or simply
gas, and is expelled from the rectum in a process colloquially referred to as "passing gas", "breaking wind" or "
farting". Flatus is brought to the rectum by the same
peristaltic process which causes feces to descend from the large intestine. The
noises commonly associated with flatulence are caused by the
vibration of the
anal sphincter, and occasionally by the closed
buttocks.
We will use the word toot or tooting in this post (my kids can't say fart, I know I am a mean mom, but it sounds better than fart).
Tooting brings great joy to most men (or at least the men I know). It's cheap entertainment. The louder it is the funnier it is and the worse it smells the better it is.
Take for instance my brother.....tooting, when sitting on me will bring hours of enjoyment, especially if my husband is present when it happens. I just want to throw up in my mouth.
Or how about my husband? Hopefully he doesn't read this because he might kill me. He thinks it is funny to toot in the store and then loudly say "Kenzie, that is disgusting" as he walks down the aisle leaving me standing there horribly embarrassed because everyone thinks that it was me.
The joy of tooting can best be described on a camping trip when we were little. My brother (I think he was 4ish) had to go pee after we were all tucked away in the camper. So my Dad got up and took him to the porta-potty near the camp site. They were gone for about 15 minutes. When they got back my Dad had the giggles really bad (and he never gets the giggles). When we asked what happened, my Dad had tooted while they were going potty and my brothers response was "Do it again Daddy, do it again." We laughed for hours and still laugh when this story is brought up.
Men think their toots are a badge of honor. Which has rubbed off on my daughters thanks Ben. The girls are very proud of themselves when they toot and it's even worse when their Dad is around because he applauds them. How am I supposed to teach them manners when they get a laugh and a "good one!" from their Dad or uncle???
I realize that everyone toots, but please go into the other room. I don't want to hear it and I especially don't want to smell it.
Am I the only one who thinks tooting should be done in private? What about your husbands/sons/brothers? Do they think their gas is funny?
